Renee,
I think I know why I'm not getting emails from you: I tend to delete as spam stuff without something in the subject! We have a new function, by which I can put a green dot, next to your name, so I can "delete unmarked," but not delete you. I'll do that when I finish this email.
Angela? I think her name is? brought up the subject of my freelancing. I'd met Beaver downstairs, and I told her about NNN on the way up, since she is thinking about learning to write news, too. She told Angela.
Angela and I met at the broadcasters' conference and attended the session on independent production of documentaries. She's very curious about independent production.
That's why she was asking me detailed questions about selling stories to various markets. She even asked me pay rates, how long until the check comes, etc.
If she was supposed to be doing something else, or if Beaver was, I didn't know about it. If they needed to rehearse instead of discussing freelancing with me, it's their responsibility.
I was hurt that your comments were directed at me and not them. I was also hurt that your criticism is usually public. I don't handle that at all well, especially when others are doing exactly the same as I.
I'll try not to curse, but everybody else does, so it's hard to remember that I have to comport myself differently than others.
I was waiting for Danny to give me a ride home. I have no place to wait, except the news room or that lobby area.
Apparantly, just the sight of me, waiting in the Volunteer Room, offends the sensibilities of certain staff or something. I've been asked by the Volunteer Coordinator not to spend more than just minimal time there.
That news room was so boisterous tonight, with everybody excitedly talking about all manner of stuff. I didn't think my few comments about my story were inappropriate, under the circumstances.
Please remember: I've been screamed at, cursed, hit, shunned and gossiped about by paid staff at that station. I, on the other hand, have tried to restrain my impulses to anger. There are people in that station who, were they to approach me in the War Zone as they have at that station, would be literally snatched bald. I wouldn't do it. And I wouldn't encourage it. But, by the standards of the 'hood, such abuse would be met with retaliation.
But I've comported myself in as lady like a manner as I could manage, under the circumstances.
I do, however, tell these people, at length, what I think of them -- and their mothers -- when I'm not at KUNM. Not to their faces, mind you, as I don't wish to alarm or alienate them any more than they already are, but I do vent, once I leave and feel safe.
So, I'm sorry I irritate you. I truly am. I genuinely respect you and value your feedback and support. I felt a great deal of satisfaction when you read my copy today, for instance and had few changes to suggest. Your opinion is important to me on several levels.
Angela, I hope that's her name, and I can make arrangements to discuss these issues at other times, or she could drop by earlier than assigned on her news reading days, so we can talk.
I feel very satisfied by the work I accomplished today. I'm almost up to speed, and soon should be able to complete an assigned story in one day.
I had to leave when Danny was ready to go. And it was so close to air time, I didn't want to interrupt by saying my good byes to every body.
Until I get paid, I have to rely on rides from Leslie, Danny and Rachel.
By the way, FSRN.org DID air my piece on Weapons Grade Uranium, YESTERDAY! I found it in their archives today. And, yes, I've submitted and invoice already!
So, next month, things ought to be MUCH smoother for me, financially and, therefore, otherwise.
Thank you for writing. I do appreciate it.
SIncerely,
Rogi
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