desperate times call for desperate measures

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Well, my suspicions have all been confirmed. I need to talk. I'm trusting you, so please let me know: if you can talk and, once we start, if you're able to handle the responsibility of what I'll say.

There IS a conserted effort at KUNM to marginalize me. I feel very betrayed and disrespected.

I need your help. I need to get as independent of that station as possible, as soon as I can. I need advice. You know a hell of a lot more about this than I do.

You know where I live. If, one day at your convenience, you could stop by for, perhaps, a meal and a conversation, I'd be VERY grateful.

I need about an hour to start, to set myself up.

Then, I'll need to email you occasionally, as I go.

I'm trusting you. I'm trusting you to get beyond some of your own stuff about me and take me seriously.

I REFUSE to fail at this. I refuse to be painted into a ghetto or gaslighted. I refuse to be responsible for others' insecurities and inadequacies.

I MUST get good, as soon as humanly possible, so I am not dependent on KUNM for every bit of equipment, computer program, etc. I need.

I'll educate myself. I can start with A.I.R. and continue from there. I'm not asking you to teach me to be a good broadcaster.

I'm asking you to help me define my agenda and my goals, because you can see things I can't.

I'm in a LOT of pain right now, but won't dump that on you by the time you get here, if you come.

I'm not going back to the station 'til I have my scooter. I won't be there after 9am, most days, anyway.

I really hope you're who I think you are.

I have to trust somebody, and I'm choosing you.

I'll take full responsibility for that: you don't have to live up to my expectations. It's my need and my risk.

I need a mentor.

I need an allie. Alley? Alibi. LOL.

I could use a friend, but I've lived without this long, so, I'll try not to lay that responsibility on you.

Don't be scared, please. I'm not going to bleed you dry to fill my needs.

And, if you feel uncomfortable, just check in with me about it.

But, dammit, if I don't do something serious, and do it soon, this is all going to blow up in my face.

I do NOT want to fail! Especially if it's because other people are making me up, rather than hearing me.

Tr says, "the proof's in the work."

But I'm being refused the opportunity to work, because they think I "can't be trusted."

Breaks my heart, bro'.

Can you help? Will you?

Is there ANY way I can reciprocate your effort? I hate to "use" you, without paying somehow.

Ok, that's too much from me.

Thanks for your time.
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Thank you,

Rogi Riverstone

http://rriverstone.com